Another year. Another chapter of life closed and going down in my book. I wish I could accurately put into words what 2015 has meant to me – what it’s been for my heart. It hasn’t been easy, but oh how it’s been worth every moment.
The last year has been one filled with a lot of change, challenges, opportunity, stretching, growth, and dreams I would have never imagined coming to pass. It’s been a sea of emotions that has washed me up on the most unexpected shore at this point in my life. The best part: there’s no place I’d rather be.
I feel like a completely different person. I feel more like me than I have ever been. At times I don’t recognize myself in the most beautiful way possible. I even look more and more like ME every day.
I started 2015 off by flying to one of my favorite nations, HAITI, and lead my very first missions team on a 10 day trip to Carrefour. Taking people to other nations and creating opportunities for others to be apart of what God is doing in the nations is a huge passion and dream in my heart. I would have never expected to be able to begin doing this at only 19. God pays attention to your dreaming heart, be sure of that.
I turned the big awaited “21”. That alone felt like a major shift in my life. I’ve never felt much when it has come to age and getting older. Another year, another birthday. Yet, this one was different. I had a feeling that this 21st year would be one of defining moments for me and between the Lord and I. It’s been completely and overwhelmingly accurate so far.
I returned to another one of my favorite nations over the summer, the Dominican Republic, and spent a month interning for my favorite missionaries. I was finally able to see my beautiful Dominican god-children after five long years! It was beginning to feel like I’d never see them again. Kids grow ridiculously fast, so you could see why me not being there in five years was a problem. They may be out growing me, but they will never outgrow my abundance of kisses for them. Never.
I moved to a brand new city at the end of the summer. A place I’ll be calling home, until the Lord says otherwise. Here, I began my first year of ministry school! Another dream that I hadn’t expected to come to pass so soon. I’ve grown more in the last few months of school than I ever could have imagined. My first year at BSSM is reaching that half way point. I would start over and go back to day one of school just so I could re-experience all that God has done so far. It’s been a beautiful roller coaster.
One thing I’ve always admired about the Lord is how He outdoes Himself EVERY time. I knew it would be good, but I didn’t imagine it to be this good. Absolutely incredible and not at all easy. Isn’t that the story for most great things in life?
This year has been one for the books. It’s stretched me beyond what I thought I was capable of. It’s left me stronger than I thought I was. It’s carried around with it a mirror, causing me to see who I really am. Not only see, but love. This year has awakened some of the many dreams in me. I’ve always been a dreamer. Lately, I’ve kicked it up a few notches. This has caused me to realize that even my craziest and wildest dreams aren’t accurately sized in proportion to how good my God is. It was clearly time to step it up.
One of my favorite things about God is how extravagantly faithful He is. My definition of Gods goodness and faithfulness is expanding, yet again… This has caused me to reexamine how I dream and how I prioritize pursing my dreams. There have been countless moments this past year where I have seen how sweetly and how closely the Lord has paid attention to the desires of my heart.
He has completely and utterly out done Himself.
He is constant. He is good. He is faithful. He is trustworthy. He is extravagant. He is powerful. He is strong. He is unchanging. He is full of surprises. He is aware. He is fierce. He is proud. He is true. He is kind.
2015 has been a year of countless opportunities for me to know God deeper. This is the one thing in life that I want more than anything….I want to KNOW God.